Crocheting My Life Back: Update 1

The Statistics
Current Weight: 297
Weekly Loss/Total Loss: -3/-3

Squares Allowed: 3
Squares Completed: 0



Thoughts on my weekly change
First, I have decided to ONLY look at the main poundage, no ounces. 300.4 is 300 and 297.8 is 297. I think this is a lot better than looking at the ounces because a girl could really drive herself insane with that sort of thing. Besides, 2 ounces is the difference of weighing with your underwear on or stepping up in your birthday suit.

I also want to note that my legs are SO SORE right now I can barely walk. Why, you ask? I work in a 6 story building that has at least 3 flights of stairs between each floor... some have more. And on Tuesday and Wednesday I went from the basement to the top floor... I did that again on Wednesday only adding going all the way down as a little cherry on top (compliments of my crazy helpful friend who cheered me along the whole way). On Thursday, since my legs were sore but still moving, we went up 3 stories (roughly 9 flights) and then took the elevator up to the top and walked all the way down.... down was definitely painful and this morning, dear readers, I can barely move. I'm taking the day off from stairs and will be walking around the city block instead... slowly.... with my friend.

Things I have changed in the last week
What did I do in the last week... well, technically 4 days since my first post.

The hard part with this is that I can't cut out sweet drinks because I don't drink them. I normally drink water and then in the morning I will drink a glass (literally 8 ounces measured) of milk. I couldn't cut out "eating out at fast food restaurants" because we don't do that. We have McDonald's maybe twice a year - if that. We don't eat fast food take out - if we go out, it is to sit down restaurants. BUT those aren't so angelic either.

So what did I do - I definitely watched my portions a little better and I avoided fried foods. I cooked at home on Tuesday night which easily turns into an eat out kinda day. I also kicked myself in the arse and started doing the stairs at work simply because every little bit helps. When you are my size - getting your heart rate up for 5 minutes is a good thing. While it may only take me 2 or 3 minutes to get up the stairs, my heart rate is up for quite a bit after which to me is great cardio.

Things I want to do next
I think the biggest thing I want to do next is to begin introducing exercise into my home routine. I admit, I watch the Biggest Loser. It was a major motivating factor 3 years ago when I lost 70 pounds - it is good to hear their stories and to hear their breakthroughs. Now - I have to say that any logical person knows that there is no way to lose weight like that UNLESS you have the equipment available and the time. Those folks are working out 5-6 hours a day - working out becomes their real job... so you have to keep in mind that while their results will not be like yours, you can still use them as an inspirational point in your journey.

In last week's episode, Bob had his team work out with a deck of cards. I want to do this.

So my plan this weekend is the following:
1. Get a deck of cards (surprise - as a computer nerd if I play solitaire, I play it on the computer LOL)
2. List out the types of exercises I want to do. Bob only used 4, but because I want to do this ongoing, I'd like to mix it up a bit so each time I workout with the cards, its not the same four.
3. Come up with a "drawing method" to assigning the exercise types to the card values
4. Do a workout.

I plan on doing 10 or 15 cards first week, then increasing the number of cards I use until I am up to all 52 cards. If you are interested in the workout, I'm sure you can  YouTube it OR just ask I can can explain what he did and how I am integrating that workout idea into my life.

I will update you next Friday on if this was done and if so, how successful I have been with it.

As far as my Life-ghan, I also want to chart out the squares and color placement this week. I have some graph paper and I hope to have a decent design laid out so I know just how many of each color square I need to make.

Picture Time

Ok, now its that portion of the blog where I own up to what I really look like.

This is me.

I don't look happy. I don't look healthy. And I definitely don't look like I want my picture on this blog.

Well, Cris - tough kitty paws.

Look at yourself.

I'm not what the majority of American society stereotypes a standard 300 pound woman to be. I don't have fat rolls over my wrists and I am still relatively active. I'm 5'9" tall and built like a large framed male. This is why I think losing 100 pounds is going to take me very close to my goal weight.

What I plan on doing is sharing a picture of me at different milestones - perhaps every 10 pounds lost? I will try to wear the same clothes in the picture for as long as I can. What I will also feature in the picture is my bag with yarn and squares so you can see the growth of my life-ghan. In the end, my last picture, will be me being wrapped in my life-ghan rather than this weight that is strangling the life from me that I desperately want to hold on to.


Reflections & Responses to Last Week's Comments
First and foremost I want to say THANK YOU to everyone who posted a comment on my post earlier this week. The support and encouragement is seriously warming and appreciated. It is very hard for someone like me to "lay it on the line" - AND include numbers. It's embarrassing that I have allowed myself to get this far and I know that if I don't stop it, it will get worse. And by worse I mean eventually I will be housebound... I will be miserable... walking would be a chore which means I'd end up sitting further off in the distance while my children continued to grow up and move on.

Next, Colletta asked me what pattern I was going to use. I realized I had completely forgotten to include that information. The pattern I'm using for my Life-ghan is called "Shells Around" and was designed by Aurora Suominen. It is a free pattern on Ravelry.

A few folks expressed interest in joining me on this journey because they had some weight they wanted to lose too - well, to that I say "YAY!" - I would LOVE to have others join in on this effort to get healthy and create the visual reminder of what they have done. I know that a full afghan can be a bit tedious and intimidating and I say - well, yes, they are BUT if you only do them a little at a time, then there is no pressure on when you finish... since its a "Life-ghan" then I'd say its important you eventually finish. Of course, you can always pick a larger square if you have fewer pounds to lose or you could do something with rows - find a pattern than has roughly as many rows or squares or whatever as pounds you need to lose. Its just a matter of rewarding yourself with whatever measure you choose.

I already have a Ravelry group associated to this blog which is the iYarny group. Keep in mind the chat module is also open so we could have weekly get-togethers to discuss what we are doing and our progress. You can also post in the forum with links to your blog updates if you like. You do not have to share your current weight - how you set up your blog updates is your own business. I only shared my weight because it is shocking to me and I don't want to hide behind it.. I don't want to play it off like its not as bad as it really is - although truthfully, that's how people I know are... they are stunned when they hear my real weight. If you are interested in the Rav group, its called iYarny.

Since I touched a little on blog updates, Colletta asked if she could use my button. I don't mind at all. Be warned it is tagged as "Crochet With Cris" down in the shadow of the ball of yarn. If you don't mind the watermark then I don't mind you using the image.

As far as reflections on my weight loss and how I feel now, I feel pretty darn good. I remember how much it amazed me before that even 1 day of a good bit of exercise can really change how you feel. Getting your heart going again and really oxygenating your muscles makes your body feel better even with the first workout. And this time round is no different - while I have not lost oodles of weight and really I haven't changed too terribly much, I feel better. I'm walking taller and I just feel better. When I get home I don't just crash. I know that has to sound completely absurd to any person who is not obese or morbidly obese - but you have to believe me on this one.

To anyone who is reading this that is considering starting a weight loss journey of more than say... 50 pounds - its true. Get out - dig up any little tidbit of motivation that you can and drag yourself, even if you don't want to go, somewhere and get some cardio in - you will feel like cold fire is ripping your throat out during the workout - but afterwards, when your heart rate begins to settle back into its norm, when the sweat starts to dry on your forehead - you will feel it. You will wonder why you don't feel as tired as you normally do. You will wonder what in the world - why do my arms feel lighter and why am I walking taller.... its just what that 10 minutes of cardio can do for you. And the next day - when you go to do it again, it won't be so miserable to find that motivation to do it and that cold fire won't be as bad.

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